Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

I wonder what the origins of that quote are?  It is a line we use and hear frequently, but rarely do I give it more than a passing thought.  It sounds easy enough, right?  In all honesty, if you stop and think about it, isn't it the small stuff that we sweat about the most?  Why is it so hard to let those things go?

Generally speaking we feel that we have the most control over the day to day, how you live your life stuff.  It is the BIG stuff like, illness, death, state of our country, lives of others... that we feel more of a loss of control over.  So it makes perfect sense that it is the small stuff that we fret about so. Yet worrying, fretting, obsessing, fearing, etc...is one and the same whether something is large or small!

My husband and I have been privileged with the role of caring for an elderly woman who was/is my husband's mother figure throughout his life.  When I first met her, she was strong, capable, and totally independent and always had been.  Slowly she sold her house, moved into an retiree apartment complex, and thus began the shift in her life.   In the last 10 months we have watched her lose more and more control over the "small stuff", and become dependent on those around her.  From moving into an assisted living facility, needing someone to remember to give her the necessary medication she requires, to needing help getting dressed and going to her meals.  The most recent shift this week was moving her to our area into a memory care facility where she will get all the love and care she needs, with plenty more visits from us.  Her memory is not all gone, but her needed level of care is high.  Through all of this, when I sit back and reflect, I see just how much energy is wasted sweating the "small stuff".  There is so much in this life that God has blessed us with to enjoy and partake in, that I do not want to be near the end of my time on this earth, and realize how much time I wasted worrying, fretting, and putting so much time into the things that do not matter much.  I can tell already that there is going to much learned by being in the company of the wise and aged people where she is living.  I do not think that they look back on their lives and think, "I am so glad that I spent a lot of time consumed with the size of my thighs, the latest trends, whether or not my kids are the smartest or best behaved."  But rather they will be at peace knowing that their life was lived filled with love, joy and appreciation for all that God had blessed them with, whether great or trying in their eyes.

Give it a try....Don't sweat the small stuff!

Finding Freedom

Finding freedom has been on my mind a lot lately.  Being in the company of others who are sharing real life events of people struggling with an addiction, that year in and year out just seems to be getting the best of them,one them ultimately taking their own life, has spurred on this thinking.  The complexities surrounding such life stories is almost mind boggling.  How do we end up there?  And what is it that makes some come out of it so much for the better, and others to never come out of it at all?  This thinking can be applied to a depression, alcoholism, drug addiction, eating disorders, pornography,abuse, and the like.

Another question that has been plaguing my mind, is for those that do come out of these trials completely free, how many, if any, were able to do it without the very person of Christ being a part of their life?  Maybe my sphere of influence is so limited, but every person or situation that I have heard of that has been able to walk out of a situation of the like, completely free and accepting of forgiveness, knows Christ and has made Him a significant part of their life.  I have known many that are able to "live" with these addictions, accepting that they will just make the best of it and get used to it.  I was told many times in my treatment for anorexia, that I would always struggle with it, but I would learn to cope and be pretty healthy.  That is not complete freedom to me.  That is coping/surviving, not freely living!  I know that Teen Challenge experiences around a 70% success rate of those that have completed their program, and secular treatment centers quote anywhere from 1-15% success rates.  I realize that these are just statistics, and change year by year and may not be the most accurate, but it does make you think. 

Personally, I know that without being able to cling to my personal relationship with Christ and the truths in the Bible, I would not be able to say that I have been completely free for almost 10 years now.  However, I know that there are many that cling to Christ and the truths in the Bible, that have not found complete freedom from the affliction at hand.  Complete freedom for me did not happen overnight by any means....it took a good 6 years!  There were many times I pleaded with God to take it away, but the answer did not come right away.  This discussion could really open up with many questions, but for tonight, the thought is... Do you know of anyone that has found complete freedom from an addiction, or something of the like, without Christ?

I would love to hear any thoughts that you might have on this.  Just click on comments below and leave me your words of wisdom =)  

How Great Thou Art

I love Christ and all that He has done, is, and always will be. My life may not always reflect this accurately, yet there is just something about this hymn, and her rendition of it that brings me to my knees in awe of the character and depth of love in God.  I wanted to just post the lyrics and have the song playing on the side bar, but that could not be done.  So here it is on a you tube clip, with the lyrics to follow.  All too often we forget to step back and remember just what has been done for us. Taking the time to enjoy this song is a simple way to do just that!  Enjoy!

O Lord my God, When I in awesome wonder,
Consider all the worlds Thy Hands have made;
I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder,
Thy power throughout the universe displayed.
      
     (chorus)
     Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
     How great Thou art, How great Thou art.
     Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
     How great Thou art, How great Thou art!

And when I think, that God, His Son not sparing;
Sent Him to die, I scarce can take it in;
That on the Cross, my burden gladly bearing,
He bled and died to take away my sin.
     (Chorus )

Verse 3.
When Christ shall come, with shout of acclamation,
And take me home, what joy shall fill my heart.
Then I shall bow, in humble adoration,
And then proclaim: "My God, how great Thou art!"

Airbrushing and Photoshop

I have mentioned the deception we are faced with when we look at photos in magazines and other publications.  The airbrushing and photoshop that occurs can be devestating to us if we are unaware of it, and just how much of what we see is not real.  Prompted by some headlines this week about unreal photos of people, I thought that I would post these videos for you to view.

Here is one about girls and their self-esteem, by DOVE Campaign for real beauty.

I hope this gives you some food for thought, the next time you see photos that make you feel less than the beauty that God has created in you!

Cultivating Contentment

"You were made for more than this world has to offer you.  Our yearnings, longings, cravings, and hopes are telling us something: there isn't enough love, peace, hope, friendship, and intimacy on this earth to completely satisfy us.  We will always want more."

Nicole Johnson

Cultivating Contentment, that is the name of the Bible study I was blessed to take part in this summer.  I cannot even begin to explain to you how wonderful and thought provoking it was!  When you stop to think about it, isn't contentment a huge force that propels us throughout each and every day?  It really truly is a driving force behind the thoughts we think, things we say, and actions that we do.  We are seeking to fulfill a longing of purpose or fulfillment is some way, shape or form.  

I am truly drawn to people and desire to emulate people that exude contentment.  There is such a peace and comfort in their surroundings.  Does it ever feel to you as if this is something so hard to attain?  Have you ever thought of this discontentment as a gift from God?  Maybe it could be.  Do we really want the things of this disappointing, sinful world to be the fulfillment of our wildest dreams?  I am oh so glad that something far better awaits us!  How easy it would be to just claim that since this world is not meant to completely satisfy us, I am going to freely express my discontent attitude.  However, that is not to be.  We should be filled with peace knowing that there is more to this life than meets the eye, and humbly accept that which comes our way each and every day.

Even though this world is not my true home, there was (and is), so much more to learn and apply in my daily life.  There is the passage in Proverbs 19:13 about the nagging wife being like a constant dripping.  Those closest to us will probably love to speak up their opinion about us on this topic!  If you look through different versions of Prov. 19:13 and 27:15 you will find these descriptions: quarrelsome, constant dripping, bothersome, nagging, annoying, contentious, leaky, and my favorite, drip, drip, drippy!  Yikes, is what I felt when I read this.  This is definitely not what I want to be or portray.  A discontent, complaining attitude not only gets out of control so easily, but it rubs off on those around us!  We had a lot of discussion about complaining versus discussing things with someone we trust.  The conclusion we were able to draw was it is the motive behind it that determines which it is.  God did give us other people to comfort us in our troubles, and to share this journey called life with. 

Every day we have the opportunity of  being transformed into the likeness of Christ.  Just like what food is on our plate varies from day to day, so do the things on your life's plate.  It is always enough to satisfy, we need to remember to say Thank You.  Our personal contentment hinges a lot on just how much we are trusting God, and learning to see life through His perspective. I am challenged, to face each day with gratitude in ALL things, and when asked about the variables in life to respond with "Can't Complain!"

"I will forget my complaint; I will change the look on my face and smile." 

Job 9:27 NCV 

Blogging Break

Well, I have decided to take a little break from blogging.  Days just seem to get away from me right now, and the readers just do not seem to be there:(  So for now, unless I am unbelievably inspired, my blog will be on hold.  Enjoy your summer and feel free to check back from time to time to see if anything new has been posted!

Guilty, or Not?

Guilt....that feeling seems to creep over me a lot in life.  It probably has something to do with my perfectionistic and people pleasing nature.  It is a plague that I need to do something about!  I am sure that you have found yourself in similar circumstances from time to time, and yes sometimes there is a very good reason for that feeling to come creeping in.  During those times forgiveness needs to be sought out, but I am thinking more along the lines of guilt that is there unnecessarily.

Guilt is described as self-reproach for supposed inadequacy or wrongdoing.  It is placing upon ourselves the feeling of failure, where failure is not due.  It can creep in when you feel as if you did not do what others thought you should, you are not good enough at what you have to do, or maybe you set too high of a standard for yourself overall!!  Whatever the case may be, Satan loves it when we dwell in the plague of guilt!  Then we are not claiming what is rightfully ours, that is above his control.  He cannot take away the fact that we are redeemed and made righteous, but he sure knows how to distract us in to forgetting!!!  Whether we are a mother, sibling, friend, spouse or child, there are many things thrown our way that could cause us to have unnecessary guilt, that is a fact, but it is what we do with them that matters.  I am going to share yet another part of a writing by Marie Chapian that touches on this subject so profoundly.

"Examine the words you speak, because it is you who are hardest on yourself....You shall establish yourself in righteousness, in conformity with the Father's will and order.  Hear me in the wrestling of your mind, for My call of love is true and powerful.  

I shall put you in a place far from the thought of oppression or destruction.  I shall lift you up above the guilt and shame, and sin shall no longer be your master.  I shall lift you up from fear and from terror, for it shall not come near you.  

Do not caress guilt as though you deserve it.  Confess to Me your wanderings, and the ease with which you curse the One who loves you.  Guilt is not your friend, and feelings of guilt do not make you holy or clean.  Be holy as I am. 

I give you the garments of praise so you can throw away that old tattered and foul-smelling coat of collected sins and guilt.

When you are forgiven, you are free.  Whom the Son makes free is free indeed."

Are you truly guilty, or not?  The freedom in our minds comes from resting in the peace that we are forgiven and made free, knowing that He who began a good work in us is faithful to complete it, and has not, nor will not give us more than we can handle.   Be still, allowing yourself to accept with confidence that which you are and all that God has given you!

"I have blotted out as a thick cloud your transgressions, and as a cloud your sins.  Return to Me, for I have redeemed you." Isaiah 44:22 Amp. Bible

Finding Balance

Finding balance is something that I think we all struggle with in one area of our life or another.  For me balancing work and motherhood is sometimes the most challenging of them all, especially during this season of the year. Keeping with the focus of the blog though, let's think about balancing caring about our appearance versus it's what on the inside that counts.

I will be honest, I really do not know a black and white answer on this one, but rather a few tidbits of thought out responses.  We know that it is stated in the Bible that "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes.  Instead it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight."  1Peter 3:3,4  That would lead you to the thinking that it is not right to think of your appearance as having any such importance.  Yet on the other hand you think of the example of Esther in the Old Testament and before she was chosen as queen she had to complete 12 months of beauty treatments!  That was to make her presentable in the king's presence. Now we are left with the impression that it is important to place great care in our outward appearance!  To really get a grasp on what God is trying to teach us, more of scripture needs to be taken in to account.  We are commanded over and over to place God first, to not live as the world does, and to care for that which He has given us.  We are to live by the examples of the lives that are shared with us in the Bible.  People that are more concerned with the eternal than the external.  Serving, not obsessing.

Where exactly am I going with this?  I do not believe that it is necessarily the right response to pick one side or the other to live by, but rather to find that balance. Are we so preoccupied with what we weigh, the size of our thighs, or the style of our clothes, that we put time with our Savior and that which He has called us to do, in any other place than first?  Are we so obsessive about getting in that exercise and analyzing every morsel that we put into our mouths, that time spent with those close to us gets pushed aside?  It can be a great struggle to find that balance, and yet we are fully able to do that which He has called us to do.  We are the temple of Living God, and we are to care for it and treat it with the utmost care, while not placing unnecessary attention on ourselves. I encourage you, (and myself included!!!) to step back, take a look, and ask God if you have found that balance between external and eternal.  May you find that beauty which comes from a gentle and quiet spirit!

Does She Have An Eating Disorder?

Since I did partially create this blog to spread awareness and understanding of eating disorders, I thought that I would take the time to share some key signs and symptoms to look for when wondering if someone is struggling with an eating disorder.  Keep in mind that the person could have just a few or a combination of many symptoms depending on the length and severity of the disorder. 

 BE AWARE: A sufferer DOES NOT need to appear underweight or even "average" to suffer ANY of these signs and symptoms. Many men and women with Eating Disorders appear NOT to be underweight... it does not mean they suffer less or are in any less danger.
Anorexia/Bulimia

1. Dramatic weight loss in a relatively short period of time.
2. Wearing big or baggy clothes or dressing in layers to hide body shape and/or weight loss.
3. Obsession with weight and complaining of weight problems (even if "average" weight or thin).
4. Obsession with calories and fat content of foods.
5. Obsession with continuous exercise.
6. Frequent trips to the bathroom immediately following meals (sometimes accompanied with water running in the bathroom for a long period of time to hide the sound of vomiting).
7. Visible food restriction and self-starvation.
8. Visible bingeing and/or purging.
9. Use or hiding use of diet pills, laxatives, ipecac syrup (can cause immediate death!) or enemas.
10. Isolation. Fear of eating around and with others.
11. Unusual Food rituals such as shifting the food around on the plate to look eaten; cutting food into tiny pieces; making sure the fork avoids contact with the lips (using teeth to scrap food off the fork or spoon); chewing food and spitting it out, but not swallowing; dropping food into napkin on lap to later throw away.
12. Hiding food in strange places (closets, cabinets, suitcases, under the bed) to avoid eating (Anorexia) or to eat at a later time (Bulimia).
13. Flushing uneaten food down the toilet (can cause sewage problems).
14. Vague or secretive eating patterns.
15. Keeping a "food diary" or lists that consists of food and/or behaviors (ie., purging, restricting, calories consumed, exercise, etc.)
16. Pre-occupied thoughts of food, weight and cooking.
17. Reading books about weight loss and eating disorders.
18. Self-defeating statements after food consumption.
19. Hair loss. Pale or "grey" appearance to the skin.
20. Dizziness and headaches.
21. Frequent soar throats and/or swollen glands.
22. Low self-esteem. Feeling worthless. Often putting themselves down and complaining of being "too stupid" or "too fat" and saying they don't matter. Need for acceptance and approval from others.
23. Complaints of often feeling cold.
24. Low blood pressure.
25. Loss of menstrual cycle.
26. Constipation or incontinence.
27. Bruised or calluses knuckles; bloodshot or bleeding in the eyes; light bruising under the eyes and on the cheeks.
28. Perfectionistic personality.
29. Loss of sexual desire or promiscuous relations.
30. Mood swings. Depression. Fatigue.
31. Insomnia. Poor sleeping habits

Compulsive Overeating/Binge Eating Disorder

1. Fear of not being able to control eating, and while eating, not being able to stop.
2. Isolation. Fear of eating around and with others.
3. Chronic dieting on a variety of popular diet plans.
4. Holding the belief that life will be better if they can lose weight.
5. Hiding food in strange places (closets, cabinets, suitcases, under the bed) to eat at a later time.
6. Vague or secretive eating patterns.
7. Self-defeating statements after food consumption.
8. Blames failure in social and professional community on weight.
9. Holding the belief that food is their only friend.
10. Frequently out of breath after relatively light activities.
11. Excessive sweating and shortness of breath.
12. High blood pressure and/or cholesterol.
13. Leg and joint pain.
14. Weight gain.
15. Decreased mobility due to weight gain.
16. Loss of sexual desire or promiscuous relations.
17. Mood swings. Depression. Fatigue.
18. Insomnia. Poor Sleeping Habits. 

(Information taken from www.something-fishy.org)

Shine

Inspired by the wonderful sun shine filled weekend, I thought that I would share this song and lyrics with you.  It is amazing just how much the sun, moon, and stars draw our attention and desire.  The sun has an amazing effect on me I know...my mood for sure.  When the sun is shining my spirits are definitely lifted.  It is so peaceful to relax and gaze out at the moon and stars in the evening.  Yes, I do think that God created them just not for a physical purpose but also for our enjoyment.  I can't help but think that we also are like the sun, moon, and stars created for a purpose and allowed to shine for Christ in this world.

SHINE 

by Salvador

I woke up to another day 
Another day to celebrate 
Your beauty and Your mystery,it’s more than any eye can see 
I’m not the man I was before 
With You, my life is so much more 
Break the chains and open doors to a world I can't ignore 

Lord let me shine, shine like the moon 
A reflection of You in all that I do 
Lord let me be a light for Your truth 
Light of the world, 
I wanna be used to shine for You
   

As simple as a passing smile  
Or listening a little while 
To someone that's convinced that they are in this all alone 
Here's my chance to share the news 
To introduce the good that's You 
Here You go again, 
You never cease to blow my mind 

Lord let me shine, shine like the moon 
A reflection of You in all that I do 
Lord let me be a light for Your truth 
Light of the world, I wanna be used to shine for You 

You're the love that we all need 
You lift us up to our feet 
You hold the key to eternity 
The King of Kings alive in me.

Wearing The Crown

Romans 8:16-17

  "The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children.  Now if we are children, then we are heirs- heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory."

Lately I have had the chance to spend a little time with a princess of sorts...Miss Brainerd. I am 

not here to talk about her, but rather what I have noticed in the few interactions we have had. When she has her crown on, well, people really take notice.  There is just something about a crown that causes people to stop, and even desire to spend a little time in your company!  For us, being a child of the King of kings, we are called to the wearing of a crown and to be clothed in fine garments.  How are we to do that, you might ask?  For starters we could turn our minds to the attitudes, behaviors, and physical appearance of what we know of royalty, and then parallel that with what we know of a child of God.

The life of royalty...think poise, esteem, and adhering to a certain standard of living.  A person of such royal lineage surrounds themselves with those of similar standing.  Granted there is usually a level of pride going on there, and I am most certainly not suggesting we follow that model exactly, but rather that we see ourselves as heirs of God who are to surround themselves with others heirs of God.  "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers.  For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common?  Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?"2Cor. 6:14.  It is easy for anyone surrounded by others with different standards to lose sight of that which they believe, even more so for a child of God in a dark world!  Yet, we do not want to take on an air of pride that we are better than others, for we are placed in this world to be a light to the darkness around us.  We need to keep our feet firmly planted so that we are able to be in the world, but not of the world.

How about that crown, and fine clothing?  I know we are all awaiting this part=)  The robes of splendor and the jewels beyond compare...God desires us to behave as though we are wearing a crown(Isaiah 61:3) and fine linens.  How different do you think you would feel towards yourself if you had a crown and luxurious garments on?  Would you carry yourself with shame, embarrassment, or confidence?  God does not desire that we look upon ourselves,(that which He created and said was "Good") and insult Him with our self loathing and constant put downs.  He desires that we carry ourselves in a manner that says God did create something good, and I can put self aside and share it with others!  Our crown of beauty is not to come in physical form but "it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight".  1 Peter 3:4  I love knowing that the world's pressure of outward stuff, is just not of great value in God's sight!  Let's not forget our fine clothing!  I can think of a few examples of what we are to be clothed in, and I know there are several more.  We are commanded to put on the full armor of God(okay maybe we have stepped from royalty, to royal workers but hang with me a minute), in Ephesians 6.  The belt of truth, breastplate of righteousness, feet that are fitted with the gospel of peace, shield of faith, helmet of salvation, sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God, and finally to PRAY.  Whew!  I feel ready and definitely armed for battle.  What battle are we fighting?  The one against light and darkness.  Each and every day we are afflicted in some sort of way to hold tight to that which is right.  And we are to stand firm.  Now, getting back to the royal clothing...after we are armored up, and in right focus, how could we not experience or exude the outpouring of the fruits of the Spirit?  Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.(Galatians 5:22,23)  That to me is to be our fine garments.  That which is displayed to those around us, that which causes others to Stop..Listen..and Desire to be in our company.  

Praise belongs to God alone who is the King of kings and has chosen us to be His heirs.  I pray that we daily desire and embrace the honor of Wearing the Crown! 

Insecurity Inadequacy

INADEQUATE.  Has that feeling ever happened to you?  Like you just do not measure up, you are not good enough for the task at hand, or you just are not what you wished you could be.  Tonight, the enormously, heavy feeling of INADEQUACY came crashing down on me.  UGH!  It makes me wonder why I am involved in the things that I am, and why I take on things that I am not too sure of.

From a biblical perspective we know that God allows uncertainties in our lives, and does at times push us out of our comfort zone, but it is all for our own good and for His glory.  It is really only through times of the unknown or something totally new that we grow and are challenged to become people with greater understanding of others and ourselves.  But what about those times when you are wondering whether this task really is not for you, or could it be that you are just being really insecure about that which you really should do?  Maybe the inadequate feelings stem out of it just being the unknown, then I would say pray to be encouraged and strengthened to endure the great unknown!  From out of that may come a new found talent, or great blessings in disguise.  On the flip side, those inadequate feelings may have root in a buried sense of insecurity.  That is when ME becomes greater than whatever it is that you are facing.  I don't know about you, but I can identify the difference between the two fairly easy.  The inadequacy from a new challenge is much easier for me to overcome.  Usually when I am really bothered it is due to insecurity inadequacy!  It is when I want a different outcome, different abilities, or have taken focus off of Christ and onto me, that I get bogged down and I guess depressed.  Not only do we need to remember "For when I am weak, then I am strong"(2Cor.12:10), but also that "whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God"(1Cor.10:31). Thank goodness we are not to do things for our own glory.  If that were the way, I truly do not think that we could ever be satisfied. Taking the Me out of the situation and remembering why it is that we are on this earth, brings the sunshine back in whatever it is that we are facing.

I feel better already....maybe this post was more for my peace of mind, but I hope it touched your thoughts in some way.  Remembering who we are and where we came from is enough to knock INADEQUACY out of our minds!

Changes

I heard the last blog design was hard to read, so lets try this one!

The Lie About Self-Confidence

Okay, it has happened.  This week I have hit a what I am calling blogger's block.  I just can not think of anything to write.  So yes, I am passing on to you a few paragraphs written by someone else.  This excerpt is taken out of the book "Being the Person God Made You To Be" by  Joyce Meyer.

The Lie About Self-Confidence

"Everyone talks about self-confidence.  All kinds of seminars are available on confidence, both in the secular world and the church world.  Confidence is generally referred to as "self-confidence" because we all know that we need to feel good about ourselves if we are ever to accomplish anything in life.  We have been taught that all people have a basic need to believe in themselves.  However, that is not the truth.

Actually, we don't need to believe in ourselves- we need to believe in Jesus in us.  We don't dare feel good about ourselves apart from Him.

If we believe the lie of self-confidence, we will create many complicated problems.  We will never reach our full potential in Christ; we will live ruled by fear without knowing true joy, fulfillment, or satisfaction, and will lose sight of our right to be an individual.  The Holy Spirit will be grieved.

Don't be concerned about yourself, your weaknesses, or your strengths.  Get your eyes off of yourself and onto the Lord.  If you are weak, He can strengthen you. If you have any strength, it is because He gave it to you.  So either way, your eyes should be on Him and not on yourself."

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.' 

Proverbs 3:5,6 

Who Are Our Role Models?

With Mother's Day fast approaching, my thoughts get a little reflective on just what it is that we will be celebrating.  For me, and I pray most, thoughts of my mother are filled with joy and thankfulness.  She indeed is a fabulous role model. 

A role model is... someone we look up to, enjoy being around, and one whose qualities we would hope to obtain.  More importantly though, a role model should in fact encourage us in our pursuits in life, all the while displaying and teaching us that which is true and noble.  The topic of role models has two avenues of thought....who are my role models and what kind of role model am I?

At first glance I believe it may be easier to contemplate who my role models are, rather than put myself under the microscope and see just what kind of role model that I am.  Being diverse people by nature, it would be highly unlikely that we would each have just one role model.  Chances are, there are several, each of them encouraging us in different facets of life.  My prayer for myself and for you too, is that the people and their qualities that we look up to and allow to influence our thoughts in life, would have the characteristics that line up with the qualities of Christ rather than the world.  How easy is it for celebrities and "do gooders" of the world, to become the people we emulate!  Not that they are necessarily awful role models, the problem is that we do not truly know them.  It is frightening, especially for mothers, to see how easily children get caught up in the latest actor, actress, or singer and desire to become like them, instead of choosing to follow the pathway of Christ likeness.  We need to be so careful when choosing what/who we allow to become our role model.

On to the second thought....what kind of role model am I?  One way to find out would be to ask someone ; )  but a better way would be to ask yourself some questions.  Do I seek to live a life that reflects Christ to others?  Is my attitude towards others uplifting and encouraging?  Am I filled with love for others that spills forth into their lives?  I am sure that there are plenty more ways of putting it, the bottom line is.....do we live lives that reflect Christ?  I know I have good moments and not so good moments, but it is never too late or too early to make a change for the better!

Don't forget to take the time to thank those around you who have truly blessed you by being a great role model.  I will start by saying "Thank you Mom, and Happy Mother's Day weekend!".

The Jealousy Disease

(www.funnyfreepics.com)

We all may have a chuckle or two when we look at the photo above, but how often does jealousy rear its ugly head in our lives? Some emotions that come right along side jealousy would be, envy, bitterness, insecurity and fear. Yet I think that we could all agree that those emotions are not something that we would be jealous of! In this particular blog entry I am not referring to the type of jealousy that God has for his children. 2Corinthians 11:2 "I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy.", is more of a protective care, rather than referring to jealousy in a unhappiness sort of way. I am talking about the ugly, angry, dissatisfied sort of jealousy that breeds and thrives the more it gains a foothold in your life.

Have you ever realized when you become jealous over one thing in someone else's life, it rarely stops there? It seems that once those negative emotions are flowing in your mind, they seem to multiply and suddenly you find yourself contemplating, or shall I say complaining, over the oh so many things that are not right or are "missing" in your life. For example, Sally moves in next door, and wow isn't she a beauty! Suddenly jealousy overcomes you as you realize that she might have something that you wish you did. Not only do you notice her beauty, but her designer clothes, polished set of wheels, and look at the size of that ROCK on her finger!!! Jealousy has officially taken root, and lets watch it spread. It infiltrates your thoughts every time you see her outside, and not only her, but it sure seems like most women have it better than you. Whether it be in the looks, personality, or material possession department, they got it made and it sure seems like God left you in the dust! Not only does jealousy spread in your being, it leaches out and affects those around you. Your family hears your complaints, your friends notice your unhappy demeanor, and it holds you back from loving others as you should. Not only may others hear and see it in you, but now those thoughts have been placed in their mind for them to either dispel, or take root and grow. Now I can understand what the proverb meant in Proverbs 27:4"Anger is cruel and fury overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy?". The incredible potential of power that jealousy can have in our lives is astounding.

This quote by Francois de la Rochefoucauld states it great, "In jealousy there is more of self-love, than love". When we are so self focused there truly is not much room for love. Jealous is in fact a dissatisfaction with what we have been given, and a greed over the blessing of another. Why should God not have blessed others with the gifts He has? Are the gifts that I have been given not good enough for me? As I write this I am saddened by how much energy and emotion I have wasted in desiring that which is not mine instead of cherishing that which I do have and blessing others with it. Not only that, but I should be thanking God for the many blessings that He has bestowed on others. So when jealousy rears its ugly head lets"Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above ourselves." (Romans 12:10) and not allow selfishness to overcome that which is good in our lives.

On Jealousy by William Strode

There is a thing that nothing is,
A foolish wanton, sober wise;
It hath noe wings, noe eyes, noe eares,
And yet it flies, it sees, it heares;
It lives by losse, it feeds on smart,
It joyes in woe, it liveth not;
Yet evermore this hungry elfe
Doth feed on nothing but itselfe.

Making Moments That Last A Lifetime

Lately I have felt challenged to step back and savor whatever life throws my way. Maybe it is due to an extended vacation where I was able to slow down and really enjoy my family, or it could be from seeing a life here on this earth end at 6 years old, or it could be influenced by dealing firsthand with the aging process of an 85 year old loved one. Whichever it may be, or a combination of all 3, my life at this moment feels very contemplative.

How easy it is to get so involved in activities and responsibilities that we easily lose sight of what really matters. This day in age we seem to be pressured or even feel a sense of pridefulness in being involved in every ministry or social opportunity thrown our way. It has even affected our children with the constant pressure to have them in every activity they so desire, just so we can fulfill the expectation that society has set, to bring up well rounded and well adapted future generations.

Of course, we want only the best for our loved ones, but I guess I am feeling challenged to step back, pray and ask "What is best?". My kids, husband and loved ones are a blessing from God and I really only fully appreciate that blessing when I slow down and make the moments count. I do not want to look back so many years from now and experience overwhelming regrets because I was too "busy" to appreciate that which I already had. Yes, we are indeed in this world to be a witness for Christ to others, but what kind of witness will I be if it does not reflect in those closest to me?

Dear God, I pray that I can take each day moment by moment, enjoying that which I have been given, and growing in faith not looking so far ahead and trying to figure it all out. Amen.

Live It Out

Sometimes I really feel that God has a sense of humor, and loves to see our reactions to things. Take for instance, when I posted the last blog entry, I didn't really see it as touching something that was presently going on in my life. Today though, it hits the nail on the head for me. Time to Live It Out!

When you are blindsided by a situation that you definitely do not view as favorable, you may take it as far as devastating, what do you do? How do you react? The emotions that run through me at times like this are very uncomfortable. Yes, today was one of those days. The unfortunate happened. Plain and simple. Now what to do with it??? Of course initially, I was filled with anger, hurt, and fear. Yet as those emotions filled me, I felt like it should/can be different. I do not need to walk this path again. It is hard to think positive though when this situation has occurred before and the outcome was not favorable to us at all. In my heart I know and believe that God is bigger than everything, now I need to not tremble at the threats of Satan!

As I move forward, my desire is to cling to those promises that have been given to me, and not be defeated. "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you. So we say with confidence, 'The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?' "Hebrews 13:5,6. This time around I aim to stay focused on God's Word, and not let the situation get the best of me. Keep Scripture at the forefront of my mind, so my outlook on life is not overwhelming. Place one foot in front of the other, one day at a time. I am so glad that I have the promises of God to cling to, and a friendship with One who knows exactly what is best for me!

I'd love to hear your comments on what keeps you going when the going gets tough. Maybe we can all learn a few pointers from one another to help us to Live It Out!

More than Conquerors

I thought I would share a writing by Marie Chapian out of her book "His Thoughts Toward Me". I pray that it strengthens you to overcome that which you are battling.

The Power You Didn't Know You Had

"Now unto Him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us." Ephesians 3:20

You need to repent of a fretful, fearful heart. You worry so over problems. You lose sleep. Your eating habits are poor. Your body hurts. You ask your friends, "What am I going to do?" You ask people to pray for you. You write letters to TV personalities.
And then,
you come to Me-
after you hang up the phone-
and say, "Oh Lord, let your will be done."
I am not pleased with your anxious thoughts. There are times when you choose to become swallowed up in the old attitude of weakness and failure. You see yourself as inept, incapable and helpless in the face of problems. But why?
I told my disciples, and I tell you, that I give you the power to tread on serpents and scorpions. I have told my disciples, and I tell you, that nothing shall by any means hurt you(Luke 10:19).
Here is the problem: you concentrate, meditate and dwell on weakness, failure and doom, even as you ask that My will be done! My will is that you walk in newness of life. My will is that you see yourself a capable person and that you see Me as the strength of your life. You were created to produce fruit in the heavenly kingdom and to glorify God. You are a Christian, yet you fill your mind with ungodly fears.
You ask of Me, but you give little. Will a man rob God? You cling to your fears. You cling to your time. You cling to your possessions and your income as though these are all there is. Only what you give to others is yours. What pleases me is a happy heart. Your true gifts are those that flow from a happy heart.
Do not tremble at the threats of Satan. I watched him topple downward as he fell out of heaven. The Holy Spirit gives you power to live confidently in the face of danger. I have commanded you in my word to be strong in the power of my might because in your weakness I am strong.
Lift up the hands hanging limply at your side.
Strengthen the knees that tremble at the threat of danger and trouble.
Put on the full armor of God so that the serpents of fear and worry can't reach you.
Realize I am all you need! I have given you power and love and a sound mind, not a spirit of fear.
Become a friend of obedience. Learn to enjoy obeying My will.
My will is that you know who I am, that you love Me, and that you grasp this truth: You are more than a conqueror through Me. I give power to the faint and to those without might I increase strength.
Show Me.

What is Ideal anyway?

"If today's mannequins were actual human women, they would probably cease to menstruate"

Ideal body type, ideal body weight, ideal body image...... What do all of these things mean and just how much importance do they play in our lives? I have yet to meet a woman that has admitted that there are many days that go by that she does Not, in fact, think about her body and/or outward appearance in a negative way. Ask yourself this...how much time do I spend thinking about how I look each day? Whether it be your hair, clothes, weight, size of certain body parts, etc. After you have answered that ask yourself how much of that was in positive thoughts? Yikes! I am sure that you may be surprised, or maybe you are not! There is much that influences our thinking, but I would have to say that a lot of it is the images that are thrown at us each and every day. Like I have mentioned in previous posts, most of what we see is either photo shopped, airbrushed, or portrayed in just the right lighting. This is a topic that I feel very strongly about. It truly angers me that the "ideal" looks that are placed before us are a lot of times not even real! It doesn't just affect grown women, young girls are seeing this pressure early on, and trying to adapt themselves to these standards. Eating disorders are now being treated in very young elementary girls. That is a very frightening thought. I don't know about you, but those thoughts were not in my head at that age, and really not overly so until junior high.

A few statistics for thought:

The average American woman is 5'4" and weighs 140 lbs. The average American model is 5'11" and weighs 117 lbs. Those models are thinner than 98% of American women!!!

1 in 5 women struggle with an eating disorder or disordered eating.

If Barbie were life size her measurements would be 39-23-33 (I fear she might be a bit off balance=) )

I even typed in a search on the internet seeing what I could find out about the Ideal woman's body. The results did not portray the same images that are thrown at us each and every day. When asked, the results were all over the place. There was not a definite ideal. SURPRISE! The answers varied from short to tall, thin to having extra weight, muscular to curvy. Hmm....what are we to do with that information? Go with it! We are obviously wasting our time comparing ourselves to a standard that we think exists. If the standard was to be that we all should look one certain way, then God would have created us all thinking one look was the ideal. Instead He created us all being diverse, and giving each of us a unique view of Ideal. If you missed an earlier post of mine with links to these great eye opening video clips of Dove's Campaign For Real Beauty, please take the time to view them now. You will be amazed!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ei6JvK0W60I

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYhCn0jf46U

Being "Comfortable"

"I would like to buy $3 worth of God, please, not enough to explode my soul or disturb my sleep, but just enough to equal a cup of warm milk or a snooze in the sunshine. I don't want enough of him to make me love a black man or pick beets with a migrant. I want ecstasy, not transformation; I want the warmth of the womb, not a new birth. I want a pound of the Eternal in a paper sack. I would like to buy $3 worth of God please."


(photo - California Streamline)

I think Wilbur Rees touched on something very true, and yet very uncomfortable here. Well, at least those thoughts make me squirm a little. How often do we want something from God, just not too much, nor too little? We may desire change, but at the pace that we deem appropriate, and only in the areas we deem appropriate. It is hard when living with a self focused attitude to realize when God allows opportunities to come our way for the greater good of shaping us into the people we need to be. In this day in age we often view prosperity, good health, and security as signs of God's blessing in our lives, and question God's presence in our lives when faced with challenges and obstacles. However, it is more often than not, through trials and sufferings that the blessings and growth arise.

It is during those times of tribulation that we are faced with a great decision......trust God and allow the changes He sees important to take place, or resist and go into the pit of despair/bitterness and stunt the chance of any real growth taking place. As I write this I am convicted of the struggle I myself have in areas like this. Not always do I resist, and those times of going through the hardship with trust and anticipation of what is to come, have resulted in a richer, closer walk with Christ, and a lot of greater good for situations that I am in now. There have been quite a few instances where if situation "A" would not have happened, when situation "B" rolled around I would not have been prepared, but it was actually a great blessing because of "A". It seems very unfortunate that we would rather take the short cut around trials only to risk the chance of missing out on some of God's greatest blessings in our lives. We say we want to be like God, yet we resist suffering. We are to model Christ likeness and "he learned obedience from what he suffered"(Hebrews 5:8) so we can expect to learn great things through our suffering also.



Being "comfortable"......is what we feel our ideal situation is. Maybe it is time to let go of our preconceived idea of comfortable and stretch out in faith allowing our "comfortable" to become a step by step following after God in pursuit of His best for us.

"While I'm satisfied with cosmetic surgery, God wants to perform radical surgery."

Rick Ezell

Enjoy!

Enjoy=to experience joy; to take pleasure in; to relish

The message in church this morning got the wheels turning in my mind. We are studying the book of Ecclesiastes, and truly there is much to ponder in that writing. The main focus was to enjoy life and all it's certainties and uncertainties, for that is what we have been given. All too often we take so much in our lives for granted, and we never know when those things could be taken from us. Whether it be a person or the ability to do something, we rely on those things without really grasping just how enjoyable they are to us.

Of course I am going to focus a little bit more on this thought. Having a heart for women and the thoughts that we have towards ourselves, my mind immediately was challenged by the fact that we women in general, do not enjoy our body. How many thoughts that fill your mind each day in regards to yourself, as Webster defines it, make you take pleasure in, and relish yourself.....as is? I am encouraged to remember all those little, yet truly monumental, things that I am able to do each day without even thinking about it. Like the saying goes, you don't know a good thing until it's gone! Take the time to run through a "normal" day and then note 10 things that you can take pleasure in, that your body does. It can be physical, mental, or emotional in nature. Here it goes...I'll do 10.

1. Ability to get out of bed and give my boys a morning hug when they are still drowsy.

2. Exercise....not all enjoy it, but I do, it helps clear my mind and relieve stress.

3. I can smell...coffee, fresh bread, cookies, garlic & onions sauteing, fresh air....yeah for spring=)

4. Laughter, oh how a good laugh can just brighten your spirits.

5. I can see....the sun, my kids, and I love to read.

6. To feel emotionally, while not always enjoyed, without my emotions well life would just be BLAH!

7. To just be a woman, with a husband to love and who loves me whether or not I think my physical body is good enough!

8. For the design of my body with extra fat to help keep me warm and my organs functioning and regulated.

9. For hands to help others, to hold, to hug, to cook, and yes, to even do the dishes=)

10. Most of all, for the ability to Love! Love God, others, and even myself!

Okay, so that wasn't that hard, now comes the hard part...to remember it! If we can just take these thoughts and go with it, how much more enjoyable each and every day would be. If instead of grumbling about yet another pot to wash, take pleasure in that time knowing that if we had no hands to do it with, we would long for the ability to do this simple task. Or instead of beating ourselves up over the size, or lack of size, of our body parts, we reminded ourselves that without them, we would not be able to do a whole assortment of things. You get the idea. When you see others enjoying life, it just makes you want to be around them and have that spunk for yourself. So lets challenge ourselves to enjoy all that we are, all that we have, with the body that God has blessed us with, and be contagious with it. Everyone loves a joyful spirit.

"Start using what you have to be a blessing, and your well will never run dry."

Unknown

Headlines

In general I am not a tabloid reader or a follower of Entertainment Tonight, yet once in awhile a headline on Yahoo catches my eye. The other day I happened to notice a news flash about Jessica Simpson. Whether or not you know anything about her, the news thought that it was a must that we know this about her. Are you ready? She........Gained.......Weight! Not only do they want us to know that, but let it be known that those reporting say that it is Too Much Weight Gain!

Well by this point I am a bit curious. Just what about this change is so news worthy? So, I did a little, and I mean just a little, digging and Wow can you believe it?........She appeared very healthy and womanly. Not the no body fat figure of days past, but shapely. I do wish I could personally give her a pat on the back or some words of encouragement in this "Thin is in" world that we live in. I love seeing womanly shaped women taking a stand and not letting this society tell them how to look. It is too bad that our society finds it news worthy to put a woman down because of the change in her outward appearance. Granted, there is no guarantee that the tabloids will not get to her, and eventually influence her to revert, but for the time being I am reminded just how much importance this world places on their standard of outward beauty. Oh so often we hear (and may even be guilty of saying), "Wow! You look great.....Have you lost a few pounds?". As if that is the standard guideline of our beauty.

As I have mentioned before, it is challenging and difficult to not place the world's standard of beauty on ourselves, and it is a changing and unrealistic standard. Praise God that we are not to hold ourselves to that! We were created in the image of our Creator and that in and of itself is Beautiful!

"For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." 1 Samuel 16:7

More to Come......

I am back........I promise I will be blogging soon. Just need a few moments(days) to get things accomplished:)

Time Away

Well, believe it or not, my family is about to embark on a three week roadtrip vacation with some work involved too. So, I am hoping to be able to keep on blogging but it will all depend upon whether I can find some great wireless connections or not. My prayer is that I will not worry or fear, but just be able to relax and enjoy the many unknowns that are involved in time away like this.



Take care my dear readers, and God Bless!

You Are Loved!

Since Valentines Day is just around the corner I thought there would be no more fitting of a topic than, you know it, LOVE. So many different thoughts, expressions, feelings, and actions accompany this small, yet incredibly important word. Who would have known that 4 small letters could impact the course of someone's life for better or for worse, and have a profound affect on the way we feel about ourselves and others. I thought that you might enjoy reading kids' thoughts about love...some are funny, while others really hit the nail on the head in their observations. Enjoy!

Actual Children answers to the question “What is Love”. Love according to Kids.

“When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different.You just know that your name is safe in their mouth. Billy – age 4
“Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.” Karl – age 5
“Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.” Chrissy – age 6
“Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.”Terri – age 4 “Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sipbefore giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.” Danny – age 7
“Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more.My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss” Emily – age 8
“Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.” Bobby – age 7
“If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,” Nikka – age 6
“Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.” Noelle – age 7
“Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still> friends even after they know each other so well.” Tommy – age 6
“During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling.He was the only one doing that. I wasn’t scared anymore.”Cindy – age 8
“My mommy loves me more than anybody.You don’t see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.”Clare – age 6
“Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.”Elaine-age 5
“Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Brad Pitt.”Chris – age 7
“Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.”Mary Ann – age 4
“I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.” Lauren – age 4
“When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn’t bend over and paint hertoenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That’s love.”Rebecca- age 8
“When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.” (what an image)Karen – age 7
“You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.” Jessica – age 8

"We love because he first loved us." 1John 4:19 Most of all God loves us, and because of that love we have learned to love others. I know most of us also desire to be loved and cherished by another human during this time on earth, and when we find that, in God's time, it truly is a blessing to be guarded and nurtured. I know that I do not always succeed at treating this blessing with the importance that it deserves, and many others can also abuse this gift and thus we become somewhat fearful of it, but it truly is a word with immense meaning behind it. Because of the impact that love has in another person's life, and our own, how important it is to learn how to love from the one who has created it. God's love is perfect, and it casts out all fear, and loves even when we feel undeserving of it. God's love loves everyone at all times. God's perfect love is patient, kind, gentle, and the list goes on. I know that when I spend more time loving God, it spills over into my everyday life. I want to love others more, and what a better place to learn, than from the perfect all loving, God.

Elohim - the name for God as our creator

Today I thought I would share part of a writing by Kay Arthur from To Know Him By Name. I found it very uplifting and thought provoking, and I hope it does the same for you.

"David wrote: "For Thou didst form my inward parts;Thou didst weave me in my mother's womb. I will give thanks to Thee, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; wonderful are Thy works, and my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from Thee, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought..." Ps. 139:13-15

Have you ever thought of yourself as being fearfully and wonderfully made? Carefully, lovingly designed and constructed by an infinitely and wise God? Or-if you were very honest-do you look at yourself and despise what Elohim has created? The truth is, your face may never grace a magazine cover. You may never be asked to model for a television commercial. You may never feel confident standing before a group giving your testimony. You may not be beautiful or exquisite in the eyes of the world. But I can tell you this, Beloved.....
Your conception, no matter what the circumstances, was no "accident".
You are exactly as Elohim designed you to be.
And that design has a purpose.
And that purpose is to bring God glory.

I have a friend who is probably no more than three feet tall. Her head is of normal size, and to me she is lovely. Yet Julie spends all her days in a sling, much like a baby's walker. In order for her to move anywhere, her legs must push the rolling frame. Julie is radiant, a delight to all who meet her. She knows her Elohim! And she clings to the truth that He created her this way for a purpose. Now, please don't tell me God had nothing to do with her physical condition. If so, I must deny His sovereignty, His Word, and His name.

Why would God create people who are different from His normal pattern of creation? Why would He ever permit a human conception when it would produce what seems to be a genetic disaster? The disciples had the same question in mind when they encountered the man who had been blind from birth. They asked the Lord, "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he should be born blind?"(John 9:2) "It was neither that this man sinned nor his parents, but it was in order that the works of God might be displayed in Him"(John9:3). Oh, Beloved, if you are not happy with yourself...with your past...with your limitations...with the heartbreaking limitations of your child or loved one, run into the strong tower of the name of your Elohim(Proverbs 18:10). You may not understand how your situation could ever bring Him glory, but He doesn't ask or require you to understand. He simply asks you to trust in the name of your Lord.

Can you see how awesome it is to know that you have been created for God's glory? That you are to live in such a way as to give all of creation a correct opinion or estimate of who God is? What does that mean to you, O child of God, who is called by His name? Think about it. How would you live if you were to live for His glory?

You were created for His glory and for His purpose and for His pleasure. Your life is to be lived in such a way as to reflect Him, to show the world the character of God, His love, His peace, His mercy, His gentleness. You are to live for Him, to accomplish His will. To miss this is to miss fulfillment. It is to have existed rather than to have lived.

Go before your God and evaluate the course of your life. Are you fulfilling the purpose of your creation? What is keeping you from being or doing what you were created for? What do you need to change? What do you need to do? Will you? Answer these questions honestly in His presence."

What's Your Value?

When you think of things that are valuable, what comes to mind? I am sure that each of us can think of many things, yet they are going to vary depending upon our differing walks of life. For most, I am sure that the first thing that came to your mind was not your own self. Yet we are each of great value!

Value=the quality of anything which renders it desirable or useful. It could also be stated as excellence of character or quality/importance. I think it is the nature of humans to respond with what they are not when questioned about their own personal value. From an outsiders perspective they could say that you are valuable because you feed, clothe, and maintain your family and all of your belongings. They might also think of your value in terms of how you treat others, and the things that you do. I think that we should dig a little deeper, and see just what makes us valuable as the created being that we are.

1John 3:1 tells us that we are children of God. Since God is the Kings of Kings, that would make us princes and princesses....we are God's royalty. If you have ever wondered what it would be like to be royalty, just focus on who you are in Christ and then you can find out for yourself what true royalty feels like! 1Cor. 6:19 tells us that once we have a relationship with Christ that our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. God lives in us! Think on that a moment....The Almighty God that he is, dwells in us. I pray that as we grow in understanding of what that is, we are able to esteem ourselves the way we should as a temple of the Holy Spirit. I am not suggesting we become prideful in ourselves, but rather that we walk tall and confident knowing that God created us with great value to be an outreach of himself to the world around us. In the beginning of Romans chapter 12 more of our value is revealed. We as children of God were created each with a different set of gifts that are of great worth. When we use our gifts as God desires us to, we join with other believers and are able to work together efficiently. Without all of our unique gifts, the work just would not be complete. We are royalty, we are a dwelling place for the King of Kings, and we have unique gifts that are of great importance in the kingdom of God. But that is not all.....I have saved the best for last!

How many of us would think that we are so valuable that someone should lose their life just for the sake of ours? That has already taken place! Let us not forget John 3:16 "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." God allowed the death of his only son so that we would have the opportunity to have a life that is not only as abundant as can be, but life everlasting. Enjoy this day remembering that you are of great value in the eyes of the One who created you!

A Moment in an Eating Disorder's Mind

Eating disorders are so misunderstood. Mostly due to the fact, that they are so secretive, and those struggling with them are embarrassed/ashamed to share. Even after all this time, I myself, do not completely understand. I know many are wondering what it is like for those with an eating disorder, and why they don't just stop the silly behavior. I am going to do something that I have not done before, and that is to share a journal excerpt from a few weeks before my first hospitalization. Meaning, near one of the hardest times for me with the eating disorder. The struggle to get rid of the disorder is very evident here.

January 1st, 1996
I hate this! Is it ever, ever, ever going to end? Why do I do this to myself? I'm causing way too many problems, and hurting too many people! Everyone is so fed up with me - I don't know where to turn or go. I love my parents so much, and I absolutely can't stand what I am doing to them. Why? Why can't I change? I've just yet ruined another meal. I hate myself for making others get upset so much. Do they understand how hard it is to change? It is SO FRUSTRATING! I know what to do and I think I can do it, but when I try to do it something stops me. What is it that's in the way? How am I ever going to get better? It is so weird...sometimes I think all is okay but at times like this it seems like there is no way out. I want to know if anyone truly understands. Where is my life headed? Why do I have to go through this? This seems like a never ending roller coaster- will I ever get through it? I feel so weird lately, so cluttered. I don't know what I think, want or wish anymore. Everything I do I am not satisfied. It's like I have millions of thoughts running through my mind, and I can't focus on any of them. Problems seem to have magnified by 100 times, and are cluttering my head. I wish that I could go away, far, far away. I just want to take a break from everything. I have to weigh 100 lbs. on Wed. the 3rd, and I know that I'm no where near it. I'm ruining my life, and I have no idea why. I've lost touch with God, and I want to go back to Him, and I hear Him calling me, but the path is covered in a thick fog. My life has become such a mess. I lie a lot, I am very moody and my thinking process has changed. I'm searching for something, and I'm not sure what. Maybe God, but I thought I already knew Him. I don't think I'm as close to Him as I try to appear. I have become such a snot towards my parents. I don't want to do the things I do. Whenever I get ready to fall and give it all to God, I get really close to doing it, and then something grabs me, and pulls me back down. I want to know what has such a control over me...Satan? Constantly there is a battle raging inside of me- it wears me down. I feel like I'm being pulled in 100's of different directions. I'm also worried...I don't want my sister to watch and do the same thing-it's too scary! At times like this I want so bad to just give up-run away or sleep forever. But yet I know that realistically that won't solve a thing. But this just seems to great to overcome. What is it going to take for me to get better? I don't want to go to some hospital. I wish I never had to go through this. Only time will tell.

Struggling with an eating disorder, and truly wanting to be free, was such an overwhelming battle. I can not even put into words how controlling the entire situation was. I felt powerless to change. Maybe it was because I was looking at the whole picture and trying to figure it all out instead of how recovery happened....one small step at a time. Whatever the case may be, the journey to freedom was a good 6 years long, and much was lost, yet much was gained. Maybe the key to getting a better understanding of eating disorders, and those issues that plague us, is to open up and be real ......share with others our battles. We may be surprised what we learn,the many ways that we grow, and who we may meet along the way.

THE SCALE

(image from natural health pharmaceutical)

THE SCALE. Dread. Fear. Insecurity. Competition. Failure. Panic. Nothing but doom and gloom!

When I saw this scale image while I was searching for a picture, I just had to pick it because of the irony it represented. Seriously, a bow on something that generally brings to mind ominous feelings! Upon examining this photo I thought of a few things.... like I mentioned, wrapped with a bow made from a measuring tape. Hmmm. As if to say measuring yourself is going to bring you feelings of joy. Or maybe you could look at it in more of a realistic way for most....you are going to be tied down, imprisoned by this object, and it is literally going to weigh you down! Now I realize, that the scale in and of itself, is not an object to be feared, but the control it can take over our sense of worth is to be feared.

There are times when a scale is a beneficial and almost a necessary object. As a mother, I think back to when my boys were infants, and how the scale helped me to know that indeed my babies were eating enough and that their bodies were absorbing the nutrients properly. Since babies are obviously unable to tell you these things, it does become almost necessary to see it on a scale. In general though, the scale really is not necessary, and ends up doing more harm than good. Why do we get on the scale? To see how much we weigh, right? Why? Is that going to alter something?

When I think of the scale, I have mixed emotions. At this point in my life, I feel freedom from it. No longer does it weigh me down. But that has not always been the case. Before I was really struggling with anorexia, the scale was a gauge to see how my body was responding to the physical activity that I was participating in. Then as the number got lower, I felt a sense of power and accomplishment. As I got further and further into weight loss, the power I felt at the beginning was now replaced with a power over me. The scale could never say the right thing to make me feel good. Obviously if I gained weight, that was bad, yet it was also not enough no matter what I lost. If I did lose a little, it gave me momentary pleasure, that soon was replaced with a nagging voice telling me it was not enough. Then in the depths of my eating disorder, the scale filled me with fear. Would I weigh enough when I went to the doctor or nutritionist? If I didn't, then what was going to happen? During my hospitalizations, the scale became a very important factor for the doctors. It told them whether I was gaining my health back or not. So in that case it was beneficial and necessary. Never during that time, was I shown my weight though, and that was the start to my freedom from the scale. For many years after that I would not step on the scale, and learned to accept me without the # on the scale identifying me. Since that time I have made peace with the scale, and do step on it from time to time, but I don't want to fool you into thinking that I have mastered my body image and never do I struggle, because I am human and have plenty of moments of doubt.

The why of the scale...what is it that pushes you to step on the scale, daily, weekly, or maybe several times a day? What are we looking for? Are we fooled into thinking that if the number is where we have deemed ideal, that we will now be able to accept ourselves? Let me challenge you with the truth...No matter what it says, it will never be enough, if that is where we are seeking to find acceptance of ourselves. Even if and when you reach that # goal, you will almost always find something else that you think is not right with you. The ultimate goal is to get rid of the scale altogether, but for some, this is just too drastic, or maybe for true health reasons you do have to be on a scale. I just want to challenge your thinking on why you get on the scale, and if it is beneficial in accepting who God made you to be. If it has become an idol, or something you are imprisoned by, my prayer is that you will be able to make peace with the scale and yourself!

"We need to agree with God that when He created us, He created something good!"

Joyce Meyer

You Are Called Friend

We all are familiar with the sayings "A friend sticks closer than a brother", and "a friend loves at all times", but what is a friend, really? Friends are not always friends for life. Through the seasons of our lives, friends may change. Some may be closer than others, some may truly understand you, and some may just be there for you when the times are tough, or to celebrate the joys. For me, the meaning of friend has really changed throughout my life this far. The early elementary years, were filled with bittersweet memories. There were many kids in our neighborhood, but I seemed to be the odd one out, or the one that was picked on, and then later invited over when no one else was around. Then we move on to junior high, and again, with girls especially, two is company, but three is a crowd. I just never knew what to expect each and every day. Would I be the friend, or not? But I really did have at least one good friend at a time during these phases in my life. Someone that I shared the changing of season with. Time moved on, and throughout high school and beyond, things got rough with my eating disorder, but friends were still plentiful, and very supportive......those that really cared to help you along. Friendship does not always end well....people change, move, or just plain disappoint you, and then we once again seek that bond with another again. Life seems to get a little more complicated into adulthood, with families and jobs, making finding that deep friendship with another a little harder to come by.

Why does friendship seem to be such an important thing for most of us? When God created us, He meant for us to fellowship with one another, and bear one another's burdens. After Adam was created, God said that it was not good for him to be alone, so He created Eve. Remember David and Jonathan, or the sisters Mary and Martha, and Paul and all 12 of the disciples. Plenty of places in scripture friendship is demonstrated on almost a necessary level. That is why we were all created so uniquely...to become the body of Christ that we were meant to be. To minister to one another, and the rest of the world.

Getting back to "what is a friend?". Generally we think of friend in the terms of: one who is there no matter what; who listen without judgement; someone who tells us the truth, not just what we want to hear; encourages us when we are down; someone who shares a lot of laughter with us, and cries with us when the need arises; someone who just truly values the who in you. On the flip side, friends are able to disappoint, or judge, or even just walk away, and then what? While earthly friendship is of great value, we are so blessed to have a friendship that is everlasting. One that will not judge, even when our flawed characteristics shine through. "O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise;you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down;you are familiar with all my ways." Psalm 139:1-3 God know all about us, and guess what?!? He calls us friend! There is no greater friendship that I can think of than one with the perfect God, who knows all about me, and desires nothing less than the best for me. He is not jealous, easily angered, or changing. He is constant, ever present, my comfort, and my redeemer. The list is endless. This is by far the most valuable friendship that one could ask for.

Knowing that we have a never ending friendship with the one true God, let us not forget to cultivate that relationship, by spending time with our Friend and Maker, Jesus Christ.

"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. .....I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you......"John 15:13-16

The Worry War

The worried cow would have lived 'til now

If she had saved her breath.

But she feared her hay wouldn't last all day

So she mooed herself to death.

(author unknown)

If I had to personally pick one of my worst flaws, it would be worry! It is something that I have struggled with forever. The problem is as a child of God, worry is not just a flaw, it is a sin. That is right, a sin! What exactly is worry? The dictionary describes it as, to torment with cares and/or anxieties. Torment seems like such a harsh word, but as a matter of fact when I am truly worried, I do feel tormented! The Bible commands us in Matthew chapter 6 that we are not to worry. Once we received Jesus as Lord of our life, we are made a new creation, to be modeled after the likeness of the character of Jesus. No where in scripture is Jesus stated as being a worrier, so neither are we to be. We are to trust on the life giving character of God.

Why is the war of worry so hard to overcome? We have the Spirit of God living within us, yet we still stumble and fall. We are a new creation with new thoughts and attitudes, yet the sinful nature of our flesh still exists. It does not control us per say, but we still have to choose not to walk in it's destructive path. I see worry as stemming from a desire to be in control. The things we tend to worry about are usually the unknowns, or out of our controls. For most, dwelling on the what ifs, or going through every possible scenario makes us feel prepared for whatever may come our way. How much time gets wasted on stewing over the possibilities instead of resting in the truth that God only wants the best for us! We are given the power of Christ within us to overcome the worry in us. We are responsible to choose to loose the power of God in our lives. It is a decision to choose God's voice, over the lies of Satan. Satan does not want us to rest in the peace that only God can bring. Isaiah 12:2 says, "Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation". Notice that first the writer states that the God IS my salvation, then the He has BECOME my salvation....first was knowledge, then came believing and acting upon that knowledge.

How are we to win the war with worry? Let's take worry at face value, and see it as a sin. Then we should proceed to deal with it accordingly. Bring it to the cross, where it was abolished once and for all, and lay it Jesus' feet. Seek forgiveness, and truly despise the sin and the effects it has on our lives. Turn and walk away. Next time worry comes knocking at our door, let's decide to choose to loose the power of God within us, and pick the way of truth and peace instead of worry. "Lord, when I start to worry, please give me the strength to choose your way, instead of the way of the flesh. Amen."

"Worry is not our 'bag', so we don't pick it up."

Janice Wise

Who Are You?

This simple question can provide a vast variety of answers. If someone asked you to describe who you are, how would you respond? Generally, when asked, I would probably answer with my name, I am married with 2 boys, I live in MN, I help my husband in his line of work, and I take care of our home. When describing other people we might also mention things like....haircolor, age, gender, career, kids/no kids, married/single, ethnic background, tall/short, activities they are involved in, where they go to church, who they know, and their overall personality. While these are great for describing the overall exterior shell of a person, they really only give you a glimpse of the Who in them.

What if we answered people with information on what we perceive of ourselves in that moment? By chance it was a very productive day we could say that we are driven, task oriented, and man I am proud of my ability to get things done! Maybe the day was less than optimum, we would probably be more inclined to feel...I am a failure, I am unable to accomplish anything, I am headed no where in life, and no one cares what happens to me! What kind of response would we get? I have always found it kind of absurd that we tend to ask people, "How are you?", when greeting them, and we know that the answer is almost always going to be something along the lines of, "I am doing fine.". That answer is pretty much guaranteed whether or not the person is fine, because in general we really are not wondering how they are, but just casually greeting them. I have been tempted on occasion to answer with a very detailed, heart felt answer, just to see the reaction of the other person. Even though we do not usually answer people's question of "who are you?", with a current inventory of our feelings, it would reveal a little bit more of who we think we are.

Describing yourself in either of those ways, is in fact, a temporary description. Those things that we identify ourselves with to others, are true, but they are things that could very easily change in a moments notice. You could lose your job, experience a death, dye your hair, or change your mood. What if instead, we learned to describe ourselves in a way that is never changing? A permanent identity as a child of God. How we experience and view life would drastically change, if we really believed in our heart Who We Are. So often we let others and past experiences define who we are, and then we live according to those things. Let's make a change and look past that so called "identity", and focus on the wonderful truths of who we are as a child of God!

John 1:12 I am God's child
John 15:15 I am Christ's friend
Romans 5:1 I have been justified
1Cor. 12:27 I am a member of Christ's body
Eph. 1:1 I am a saint
Col. 2:10 I am complete in Christ
2Tim. 1:7 I have not been given a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind
Rom. 8:35 I cannot be separated from the love of God
1John 5:18 I am born of God and the evil one cannot touch me
Col.1:14 I have been redeemed and forgiven of all my sins
Phil. 3:20 I am a citizen of heaven
1Cor. 3:16 I am God's temple
Eph. 2:10 I am God's workmanship
1Cor. 6:20 I have been bought with a price; I belong to God
Phil. 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me

(Thanks to Neil T. Anderson's book Who I Am In Christ, for the list of scripture references)